(and he’s a trial lawyer…)
By Rod Brooker
The simultaneous earthquake and hurricane in East Hillsborough County was in fact the sound of 50,000 jaws dropping, followed by howls of fury that a homosexual judge, seated in the Land of Fruits and Nuts, had knocked down a California measure that forbade homosexuals to marry. We’re not talking about this civil union crap. We’re talking the Real Thing here.
There is no question that the Founding Fathers were not homosexual, or there would have been no Founding Children, and none of us would be here today. Unless the Fathers were to have paired up, smuggled into our Nation gangs of dark-skinned waifs who spoke unintelligible jabber, and adopted them. Then would some of the Fathers have become Founding Mothers? But I digress. Under this blasphemous scenario, the Founding Children would have been Converted to the Abominable Lifestyle and, making a long story short, today we would all be dark-skinned homosexuals who refuse to speak a word of English.
Those scenarios are quite odd, but then again so is the learned and honorable Chief U.S. District Judge Vaughn Walker, a card-carrying member of the Homosexual Party, who somehow fooled The Beloved Gipper into appointing him, for the remainder of his deviant life, to the federal bench. There can be only two reasons why Ronnie did such a thing:
First possible reason, the old Radio Announcer was taking one of his frequent naps at the head of a White House conference table, and closeted perverts on his staff got him to sign the papers unwittingly.
Second possible reason, the Gone and Lamented was so steeped by decades of experience in the Hollyweird culture, where probably 95 percent of all those movie types are, er, homosexuals, that in a momentary lapse of reason the Esteemed One appointed the homosexual Walker to the bench. And Walker lurked in the shadows, as his sort are apt to do, waiting for his moment to twist American society.
And to think, Gip’s nomination of the Degenerate Deemer was stalled until the presidential term of the Father of the Second Greatest U.S. President in History, who pushed said nomination through. Liberal hate groups, who are automatically against anything a Republican president does, made a great public show of outrage at the nomination of Walker, solely to distract the Nation and to tie up resources. Their scurrilous display meant investigators from various federal alphabet agencies were not able to carry out the grim task of trolling the gay bars of California, checking Walker’s background. Had these sleuths been able to do so, the truth would have outed, so to speak, and Walker would have had to sashay away from the bench. Perhaps as far as Denmark, or Sweden, or at least San Francisco. Wait! He is in San Francisco. Of course. Now it all falls into place, doesn’t it?
Rod Brooker is descended from Valrico Baptists. He practices in Tampa as a Greedy Trial Lawyer filing Frivolous Lawsuits. He is a Socialist Hippie who has buried the title of a Pink Floyd album in the writing above. “Pink” Floyd?