If Charlie Crist told the truth…

I got a fundraising e-mail from Charlie Crist the other day. It was a pretty good hoot the way Charlie “have it two ways” Crist is trying to paint himself as a Conservative. But hey, he’s starting to show some bravado – he’s even got the nerve to quote Ronald Reagan!

His recent fundraising letter would look like this

By Chris Ingram

I got a fundraising e-mail from Charlie Crist the other day. It was a pretty good hoot the way Charlie “have it two ways” Crist is trying to paint himself as a Conservative. But hey, he’s starting to show some bravado – he’s even got the nerve to quote Ronald Reagan!

Each paragraph of Chuckles’ original letter is shown below along with my version of what his letter would read like if he were to tell the truth.

What it should have said is in italics:

Dear Friends,

The fundraising quarter is coming to a close and there are just 9 hours left to join the winning team. I am working hard to raise the resources necessary to earn the privilege of representing the people of Florida in Washington, DC, and I humbly ask you to join us by supporting the Crist for Senate campaign. You can visit Charlie Crist.com right now to make a contribution of $10, $25, $50 or even $100 – whatever you can afford. 
 
Dear Fools and Idiots:

There isn’t much time left for me to continuously and shamelessly shake-down voters across this mess of a state. I’ve worked so hard raising money I almost forgot I am supposed to be the governor! Why I’m so darned shameless, I even had a huge fundraiser on September 11th. Victims, shmictims — I’ve got a campaign to fund. Send me some money now and I’ll think about doing something ‘touchy feely’ on the tenth anniversary when the media is really focusing on it. Next year is an election year, so it’ll have to wait until 10. I know times are hard, but tap into your kids’ college fund if you have to, this campaign is going to cost a lot of coin. Continue reading “If Charlie Crist told the truth…”